Here's the deal, the board is definitely cracked longitudinally due to, um, operator error but still seems to ride OK. I've ridden it many times since I cracked it, and I think edge hold when carving may be compromised but it still seems fine in pow. Having said that, I think it's best suited for a wall hanger or snowboard bench, I'm making no claim that it's usable for riding.
I finally got a replacement, so the cracked board is up for grabs for the cost of shipping from 97214. Free to someone who can pick it up, and preference given to anyone who can pick it up so I don't have to pack it.