bartron Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 ...And pick your battles. Rarely do things seem as important later on as they do at that particular time. The last thing is when you disagree with your partner and are verbally sparring, you can respond with a comment that escalates the disagreement or that doesn't. Escalation is always wrong. Even when you are self-righteously correct you are still wrong. Those are very wise words that apply to any relationship, including those with co-workers, friends and family. In my experience, the one about future importance is a bit tricky to handle, since it's usually difficult to convince the other person that the issue won't be important in the future. And I'm not talking just about kids either... :) 'later... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bartron Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 Purdy is as purdy does.I would rather snowboard with a very "plain" girl, than dance disco with a "hottie". Damn straight ! Interesting note: all my male friends and I feel the same way as you, but all my female friends think guys would prefer the disco hottie. That's gotta be the media's fault ! :) 'later... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bartron Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 I can recommend Calgary. Great snow, great people, and according to my other half, the girls here are pretty good too. I was planning on going there last fall. I had mapped out this trip where I would spend a few days in Calgary, drive down through Montana (Missoula, Butte), across to Idaho (Boise, Coeur d'Alene) and back to Calgary. The entire trip would take just over a week. I figured it would be really beautiful in the fall. But by the end of summer, I was so tired from work I opted (with the help of some persuasive dive buddies) for an all-inclusive SCUBA trip on a boat in the Bahamas. I'm hoping to go to Calgary around the middle of January, so I can get some riding in too. Hopefully this winter won't suck like last year. 'later... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bartron Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 Just speaking as someone who's been a tourist there, the sheer volume of eye candy in downtown Montreal on any given night is astounding. You're absolutely right, no arguments there. Maybe none of them are right for a relationship... That's the key. And it's not just a relationship, but also someone who wants to live the kind of lifestyle that I would be interested in living. Beauty isn't at the top on my list -- never has been and never will be. However, it is on the list. :lol: I've got to say that if you think you have to move from a city the size of Montreal to find a girl... I certainly don't think that. Boulder, CO is much smaller than Montreal, yet I'd love to live there. Almost took off there for a few days a couple of weeks ago during my vacation. 'later... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bobdea Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 damn dude, what are you looking for? Do canadian girls fail some sort of test or something? Tonja, you're kicking ass, good luck with those dates. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ncermak Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 I can recommend Calgary. Great snow, great people, and according to my other half, the girls here are pretty good too. I heard the only good one was taken! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allee Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 I heard the only good one was taken! Ooohh, Noah, you talk GAME. Bartron, look me up if you come over in Jan. We're at the hill most weekends ... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carvedog Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 Ooohh, Noah, you talk GAME. Bartron, look me up if you come over in Jan. We're at the hill most weekends ... Well he is the moderator of the OT: waaaaaaaay OT thread. And doing a damn fine job by the way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 Damn straight ! Interesting note: all my male friends and I feel the same way as you, but all my female friends think guys would prefer the disco hottie. That's gotta be the media's fault ! :)'later... Because it's true. Half the time guys won't even talk to a girl at a bar, party, social gathering if they do not have the body of a super model, no matter how smart, funny, interesting, positive vibes you put out, or what kind of lifestyle you lead. One thing I can't stand is if you are talking to someone, and they are always looking behind you at what else is going on, instead of AT you. They're always scoping. Maybe I'm not as interesting as I think I am :rolleyes: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gecko Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 Because it's true. Half the time guys won't even talk to a girl at a bar, party, social gathering if they do not have the body of a super model, no matter how smart, funny, interesting, positive vibes you put out, or what kind of lifestyle you lead. One thing I can't stand is if you are talking to someone, and they are always looking behind you at what else is going on, instead of AT you. They're always scoping. Maybe I'm not as interesting as I think I am :rolleyes: Ok I am so not a "body of a supermodel" kind of guy...they are just too damn skinny and in truth usually pretty boring. I had some odd girlfriends (one wore a mohawk) but they were all personallity types (even my wife) as I really needed someone who would do all the crazy things that I like to do, snowboard (she ski's), rock climb (she likes to), skateboard (ok so I haven't gotten this one yet) Motorcycle (she loves to) Hike (we have fun in the woods You are better off looking for someone who enjoys doing the things you enjoy doing...than barhopping for the supermodel who's gonna probably not let you do those things you so enjoy Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 You are better off looking for someone who enjoys doing the things you enjoy doing...than barhopping for the supermodel who's gonna probably not let you do those things you so enjoy Oh, I think we are all in agreeance with that statement. I'm just saying that good intentions abound, but the reality is not the same. It's a known fact that the MAJORITY of men do this, whether they want to admit it or not. Women are the same. I definitely think personality rules, but first meetings and how you meet people (in what kind of setting) is important. If you can't meet someone, how do you get to know their personality? What I'm saying is that MOST people don't give their opposite sex the time of day unless they are cute/handsome in large social situations. Physical attraction is usually what gets people talking, or alcohol. :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gecko Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 Physical attraction is usually what gets people talking, or alcohol. :lol: there is something to be said for alcohol (says he who could drink his senior year of HS) a few bottles of red wine were how I ended up playing chess on New Years Eve with a beautiful (now Air Force Officer) woman...or for that matter why I still keep a cribbage board (or 4) around the house Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skatha Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 Well.....as a doc, I work with women, married men, and cute, but gay, guys.... So...I turned to a dating service.... and met Sam, who, as an architect, worked mainly with other men and married secretaries.... we got matched because of outdoor interests and spent a few months talking on the phone prior to meeting..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mike T Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 What I'm saying is that MOST people don't give their opposite sex the time of day unless they are cute/handsome in large social situations. Physical attraction is usually what gets people talking, or alcohol. :lol: Well, yeah, large social situations imply lots of people and how else are you going to decide which 5 people out of 100 you want to talk to??? FWIW, I gave up on trying to find dates at large social gatherings after my freshman year in college. Very low success rate and frustratingly awkward. I just drank with my buddies. I wound up marrying someone I once worked with. If I were single today, I'd guess my most likely place to meet someone relationship-worthy would be on the chairlift. Small setting, good chance of shared interests, and since I ride at a resort that is more than half locals, good chance of geographical compatibility. I'm sure this works a lot better for a Bend local @ Mt. Bachelor than it does for a CO local at Copper though... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 beautiful Key word here. In what way? (giving you the benefit) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Gendzwill Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 I read a statistic somewhere that a very high percentage of married people were introduced to their spouse by a friend, or at least had common friends. I met my wife because she worked at the same company as several of my friends and we kept running into each other at company bar nights and the like. So though I met her in a bar, I don't think of it that way. And BTW it wasn't her looks that immediately attracted me (although she looks fine), it was the fact that she was jumping higher than anyone else on the dance floor. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skatha Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 That's what matchmakers were for....they matched people for compatibility and not necessarily for looks..... I wonder how'd the divorce rate would be if people relied on an objective third party than looks.... looks fade and as Ron White said "Yew can't fix stupid" Plus, my feeling is that, although guys are very visual, they focus less on looks once they have an emotional link to a woman Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Gendzwill Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 I wonder how'd the divorce rate would be if people relied on an objective third party than looks....I wonder how the divorce rate would be if people took their vows seriously and really tried to make things work, instead of looking ahead to the next fairy tale. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gecko Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 Key word here. In what way? (giving you the benefit) well in this case I am refering to what she matured into...and that is a beautiful WOMAN not a little girl. Come on now a woman who will sit down drink red wine and play chess in a greenhouse during a raging New Years Eve party? I call that Beautiful...well I do remember that she had nice green eyes too Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allee Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 Most of us are not good at this. I've got better, I used to hate them. I used to go out with a good friend of mine (now shacked up, so we hardly ever go out any more), and while she's relatively good looking and in good shape, she's certainly not a supermodel. She is a man magnet. How does she do that? She's confident. She wears her best set of look-great jeans, strolls up to the bar like she owns it, dazzles the bartender with her best smile, flirts madly with the first man who crosses her path, and then gets mobbed. She's amazing. I have learned an awful lot from watcheing her work ... Moral of the story ... you don't have to be a stunning looker, if you can project your personailty. Hiding in a corner, nobody wil notice you, even if you're a best looking girl in the room... and if you won't give a guy the come on, why would he walk over and talk to you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gecko Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 I wonder how the divorce rate would be if people took their vows seriously and really tried to make things work, instead of looking ahead to the next fairy tale. Personally it was both mine and my wifes stubborness that saved our marriage from the rough patches we had...the whole til death do us part thing and long term happiness was more important. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Michelle Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 Moral of the story ... you don't have to be a stunning looker, if you can project your personailty. Hiding in a corner, nobody wil notice you, even if you're a best looking girl in the room... and if you won't give a guy the come on, why would he walk over and talk to you? Good points here! However, I still stand by my theory. The personality projection does not always work. Maybe it just depends on the people you are around, and how much they appreciate certain things. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gecko Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 part of the problem that you have is that your neighborhood has Hollywood infestation in the winter...too many soulless "Pretty People" go to Colorado in the winter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
D-Sub Posted July 12, 2006 Report Share Posted July 12, 2006 edited. tryin not to be part of the couch session. Im pitiful enough already Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skipuppy Posted July 13, 2006 Report Share Posted July 13, 2006 I wonder how the divorce rate would be if people took their vows seriously and really tried to make things work, instead of looking ahead to the next fairy tale. Maybe people do take their vows seriously. You also have to allow for things to happen in life though and for those things to influence how a person changes. My parents have been divorced since I was in sixth grade. I LOVE IT. I used to hear them fight on the other side of my bedroom wall late at night. We've had the cops over. They weren't druggies or alcoholics or anything. They just happened to grow so far apart that they couldn't even love each other anymore. My dad is remarried to his high school sweetheart and I love her. My mom isn't remarried (BUT SHE IS AWESOME, WONDERFUL, ENERGETIC, COMPASSIONATE, BEAUTIFUL, ADVENTUROUS, and SPONTANEOUS) and I think we are all the better. My point to this post is that yes, sometimes people should put more work into marriage... but if that just doesn't work, then you shouldn't stay together and continue hurting each other. My sister and I would be really F-ed up if they had and fortunately for us- we talk to both of our parents and love them completely, and we also UNDERSTAND why things happened the way they did and are great about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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