Neil Gendzwill Posted March 2, 2006 Report Share Posted March 2, 2006 According to this column, this is the difference between us and them: Skiers hate snowboarders. It's a generational thing. Skiers are (and here I am generalizing) middle-aged Republicans wearing designer space suits; snowboarders are defiant young rebels wearing deliberately drab clothing that is baggy enough to cover the snowboarder plus a major appliance. Skiers like to glide down the slopes in a series of graceful arcs; snowboarders like to attack the mountain, slashing, spinning, tumbling, going backward, blasting through snowdrifts, leaping off cliffs, getting their noses pierced in midair, etc. Skiers view snowboarders as a menace; snowboarders view skiers as Elmer Fudd. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skatha Posted March 2, 2006 Report Share Posted March 2, 2006 I knew I was forgetting something-that nose piercing.... I'll be sure to let my skiier husband know he's supposed to be hating me prior to our nightly "therapy" lesson-he broke his leg, you know, in Nov. and I'm directing his rehab Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Marty Posted March 3, 2006 Report Share Posted March 3, 2006 I wonder, how that particular author sees freeskiers... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dave Pushee Posted March 3, 2006 Report Share Posted March 3, 2006 Taking a trip in the way-back machine, I recall having read a Dave Barry column about learning to snowboard. I think this must have been close to 15 years ago. I was sure Barry must have watched me try to take my first run on a board. He pretty aptly described the impact of body slamming into New England hardpack after catching the heel edge. That's a move I like to cal the Power Snow Angel. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Neil Gendzwill Posted March 3, 2006 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2006 The link is actually to that column. Dave's description of a snowboard: "shaped like a giant tongue depressor and manufactured by the Institute of Extremely Slippery Things". Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FTA2R Posted March 3, 2006 Report Share Posted March 3, 2006 yes, he's a well known funnyman, but he's still the press, exagerrates things. I'm sure he's very knowledgeable about snowboarding . just another not so funny guy IMO. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ak_rider Posted March 3, 2006 Report Share Posted March 3, 2006 i must have hit the nose-pierce jump wrong cause i have a hole in my tongue :D Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ncermak Posted March 3, 2006 Report Share Posted March 3, 2006 now thats a funny article... my only question is was the instructor an actual instructor, or just a buddy who snowboards? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skatha Posted March 3, 2006 Report Share Posted March 3, 2006 "This is the voice of Satan"..... I always wondered where moguls really came from....I never bought that ski patrol in November argument.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr D Posted March 7, 2006 Report Share Posted March 7, 2006 the last time this guy was on a hill was 1985.:lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Allee Posted March 7, 2006 Report Share Posted March 7, 2006 Actually, from my recollections of learning to snowboard, that's pretty accurate. After my first three days, my butt and knees were black, my hands were so bruised that I couldn't cut my steak at dinner cos I couldn't grip the silver hard enough, and my friends had to give me five minutes warning if they wanted me to walk anywhere... I think they wondered if I'd ever learn to stand up! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gecko Posted March 7, 2006 Report Share Posted March 7, 2006 Actually, from my recollections of learning to snowboard, that's pretty accurate. After my first three days, my butt and knees were black, my hands were so bruised that I couldn't cut my steak at dinner cos I couldn't grip the silver hard enough, and my friends had to give me five minutes warning if I wanted me to walk anywhere... I think they wondered if I'd ever learn to stand up!. I took an AM lesson at Stowe on my flatlam swallowtail Flite Rocket, and was struggling down Goat (making turns mind you) in a foot of fresh chop. Of course my second run on Goat got me threats from the Patrollers (Goat, Starr, National, and Liftline were off limits to snowboarders then) but I didn't spend in time in pain until I tried a halfpipe at stratton a few years later, Kelly Jo Legaz was a cool person to session with but I was bad Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dr D Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 I learned on an 80's burton with straight edges and no tail. I recall the learning curve being short but very steep. It also required copious amounts of duct tape. I was in love with the first assyms. now I see because they actually had a tail. I think my first board had something like 6" of split tail behind the rear binding. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carvedog Posted March 8, 2006 Report Share Posted March 8, 2006 yes, he's a well known funnyman, but he's still the press, exagerrates things. I'm sure he's very knowledgeable about snowboarding . just another not so funny guy IMO. I think hes really funny. Took him rafting once and he's not funny in person but I love his writing. Missed the snowboard column so thanks Neil. LMAO on that one. I love when skiers ask me "Have you been out shredding it up dude?" Sounding like a used car salesman trying to butter you up for that Pontiac with 300K on it in the corner of the lot. NOT my lingo. My answer. "I don't shred, I'm not rad and I ain't your dude." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Tom S Posted December 22, 2007 Report Share Posted December 22, 2007 As a skiier and snowboarder... who could possibly care how someone slides down a mountain? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jack M Posted December 22, 2007 Report Share Posted December 22, 2007 Dave Barry is freaking hilarious. If you do not think this is 100% funny and harmless, you are taking it the wrong way, and need to see a proctologist about that pole.... http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-srv/sports/longterm/olympics1998/sport/snowboard/articles/barry.htm Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paragonUE Posted December 22, 2007 Report Share Posted December 22, 2007 as an alpine boarder, who happens to enjoy some mountain styles from the burton catalog. I witness skiers on a regular basis who dress in a very similar way. in fact last time I was at the mountain, I saw several skiers decked out in burton gear, it confused me a great deal. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bobdea Posted December 22, 2007 Report Share Posted December 22, 2007 hahahaha skiers as elmer fud LOL yeah, he's got a point. New school skiers think they're ghetto fab, the one thing more annoying than a rich kid on a snowboard from suburbia trying to look and act like he's from from harlem is skier doing it. Skier park rats love to talk **** too, never seen anyone talk more trash than the skiers that ride the parks at mammoth. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
C5 Golfer Posted December 23, 2007 Report Share Posted December 23, 2007 Phunny thing is I will go out of my way to ride up the lift with skiers -- hate riding up with snowboarders that have no helmet, baggy pants, hyperactive a**holes and have no care for the personal space of the person next to them. So does that make me Elmer Fudd on an alpine board?? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carvedog Posted December 23, 2007 Report Share Posted December 23, 2007 as an alpine boarder, who happens to enjoy some mountain styles from the burton catalog. I witness skiers on a regular basis who dress in a very similar way. in fact last time I was at the mountain, I saw several skiers decked out in burton gear, it confused me a great deal. Probably a bunch of transgendered cross dressers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paragonUE Posted December 23, 2007 Report Share Posted December 23, 2007 Probably a bunch of transgendered cross dressers. yepp, has to be it, :lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
b0ardski Posted December 23, 2007 Report Share Posted December 23, 2007 How can they crossdress when all "new school" fashion is the same, you can only tell if they have four tips or two:lol: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
carvedog Posted December 23, 2007 Report Share Posted December 23, 2007 Phunny thing is I will go out of my way to ride up the lift with skiers -- hate riding up with snowboarders that have no helmet, baggy pants, hyperactive a**holes and have no care for the personal space of the person next to them. So does that make me Elmer Fudd on an alpine board?? Be vewy, vewy quite. I'm hunting jibbers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patmoore Posted December 24, 2007 Report Share Posted December 24, 2007 As a practitioner of both arts I couldn't resist buying these shirts at Park City a couple of years ago. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
pebu Posted December 24, 2007 Report Share Posted December 24, 2007 I've been told that I'm not a snowboarder. I tried to dispute but they wouldn't hear it. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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