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OT. Engagement ring cost and balance in life


C5 Golfer
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I was wondering how y'all feel about an engagement ring cost -- like 10,000 to 25,000 bucks and we buy this showing our love and giving it to her and we get nothing in monetary value in return. If she is working why can't we ask for a golf club membership or car or something.. why can't we get equal treatment here specially if she works and makes good money. What is the deal here, can it ever change?

I'd be willing to bet if we as men asked for something in return of equal value there would be less marriages. :D :D

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Guest Randy S.
Originally posted by C5 Golfer

I'd be willing to bet if we as men asked for something in return of equal value there would be less marriages. :D :D

And way fewer divorces!

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Some guys I know, have been lucky enough to recieve a watch from their future wives...sometimes in return for the ring, and sometimes as a wedding gift...these have ranged from $900 to over $10k...

Rolex

Cartier

Baume & Mercier

Tags

Patek Philippe

All my wife gave me was her unconditional love, and now a beautiful baby girl! I don't need anything more...it's funny how life changes after getting married, and then it changes again with the first child...changes for the better that is...

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I'm very happy with my wife's priorities. Her "jewels" are made of titanium, scandium, carbon fibre or some other exotic material.

20yrs married

I spent more money on her windsurfing gear than an engagement ring 20+ yrs ago.

perhaps that set precedent

We both enjoy using our toys not wearing them.

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Two words.....Cubic Zirconium!!

Just kidding. :)

Shop online at bluenile.com. You'll get more for your money. At the local jewelery store, my wife's diamond and wedding band both appraised for more than double what I originally paid for online at bluenile.

The way I look at it, over the years I've definitely spent about as much money on toys...snowboards, stereo & pc equipment, and other misc. gadgets. So we're even and both very happy.

C5...you should bump up that engagement ring price to $50k and try to squeak out a new C6 in the deal. :D

nzo

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It's a shiny frickin rock. I was amazed at the effort that the whole diamond industry goes through to make you believe that diamonds really are the most amazing thing in the world. It made me sick.

I'm very lucky to be with my wife - she's not into the whole big "rock" on her finger. I got her one anyway out of tradition. She'd rather get a new board or go on a trip somewhere - or just spend the money on something useful.

I like the gift in return idea, though - down payment on a new motorcycle would be cool.

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I am the real lucky one here, I discussed this with my wife before we got married, she doesnt wear much jewelery, so we skipped on the engagement ring and bought a nice custom wedding ring for around 600 (CND). Her uncle is a goldsmith, so it was a sweet deal. I didn't even get a wedding band because I cannot wear rings at work (Powerlineman) and never have worn anything on my fingers. We feel that rings and such are superficial and do not bind the marriage, its trust and loyalty and a healthy amount of sex :D . Plus we saved lots of money for free beer at the wedding!

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I bought my wife an engagement ring, actually we picked it out together. We were both still paying off college loans and she was about to go to grad school, so she had a complete and total understanding that if I bought her an expensive ring, it was goingto have a very direct impact on both of our lives for the next few years.

So I think we spent about 3 grand, which was pushing the limits of what I could afford at the time.

Now we talk about selling it, because neither of us wear our wedding bands and she doesn't wear her engagement ring. Well, except for certain dress-up events. Neither of us like having rings on our fingers and she gets hit on my more sleezy guys with her wedding jewelry than without it... so why bother?

In any case, my salary wound up paying off all of her student loans in addition to all of mine, so she scored well in that regard... and oh yeah, half the family quiver is boards that are too small for me :D

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Wow. I bought my bride a beautiful ring, but spent a fraction of that. She gave me a nice Tag-Heuer as a wedding present. I love it, even though it cost a fraction of her ring.

What is the deal if you get divorced? Can you demand the ring back??

My wife and I look at it as an investment, and as a bit of an insurance policy. Unlike any toy, it will never lose its value, and may actually increase. We can hock it at any time if we really need to. If we never have to do that, we can give it to our grandchild someday. In those senses, it's anything but a waste.

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Originally posted by fishrising

Some guys I know, have been lucky enough to recieve a watch from their future wives...sometimes in return for the ring, and sometimes as a wedding gift...these have ranged from $900 to over $10k...

Rolex

Cartier

Baume & Mercier

Tags

Patek Philippe

I got a TAG for xmas from my girlfriend, but there was no proposal attached, so I'm in the clear! :D

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25K???? And here I thought people went overboard with the "two month's salary" guideline. Unless that really is two month's salary for you, in which case can I be your special friend?

I spent more like two week's salary, and she thought it was great, but then she never liked the big rocks anyways.

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My girlfriend is not into jewelry, and the little she has is the cheap kind because sometimes, she loses some. If I spent money on an expensive ring, I think she would get mad at me for waisting money on something so futile. So lucky me. Unlucky me though because in the same line, I don't spend much on boarding equipment. Bottom line: I'm happy with what I have and with the girl I am with.

Derf

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I've always absolutly hated the Diamond Industry and all they stand for. The fact that so much of it relates to materialsim and much of it involves human suffering and makes the symbol of wealth the symbol of commitment. If you have to place the value of a relationship on a baubble that says: "Look at how much a man is willing to pay for me" that relationship could be (and I'm not saying for sure) off to a rocky start (pun intended). I'm surprised the Feminist movement did not take issue with the idea that it could be construed as "Look how much my Hooker is worth"

I can't quite equate the worth of a rock with love, and all the things that go with it. Someone told me that when a woman is young and has the beauty of youth, that would carry her over, but when she starts to age she needed jewelry to maintain her self image of beauty. This in turn leads to the whole of advertising and its persistant goal of making women and men feeling inadequate. Women with aging and makeup, wrinkle remover, and diamonds, and men with Viagra and supercharged vehicles.

Don't you think that the perfect advertising partnership would be Viagra and Hummer commercials. Think of the possibilites? A guy driving with his symbol of his manhood and a pill to make it a reality.

And with all that in mind, I took her to the jewelry store and let her pick out her own ring after having looked at diamonds for days, and when it went on her finger she stood in the middle of the store and cried in front of everyone, without any regards of being embarrassed. It made her that happy.

With that, I guess the crap that I got from everyone for breaking with my views, was worth it. She picked out the one that she thought looked the best on her hand, not the largest one.

We're both over 50.

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Guest thomas_m
Originally posted by Jack Michaud

If we never have to do that, we can give it to our grandchild someday. In those senses, it's anything but a waste.

Yeah! My wife wears my grandmother's wedding set that my mother passed on to us when we got married. No way we would have been able to afford anything like it, then or now. We basically only wear our wedding rings when dressed up for some occassion - she's afraid of losing her's due to the $$ and sentimental value, I just hate wearing rings...

T.

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Originally posted by joecarve

from this day on

my lovely dear

i prove my love

with outdoor gear

those raichle boots

and bomber plates

you wear for our

alpine dates

a CF rig

with x-ply sail

i'll gladly buy

for stronger gale

all to lead

a vig'rous life

come play with me

and be my wife

nice one, Joe

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Originally posted by bumpyride

much of it involves human suffering and makes the symbol of wealth the symbol of commitment.

this is the thing that NO ONE ever takes into consideration. Hell, with any product, whatsoever, especially in america

good point, bumpyride.

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Originally posted by Enzo

C5...you should bump up that engagement ring price to $50k and try to squeak out a new C6 in the deal. :D

nzo

Enzo i like the way you think... a 2006 model is already in my plans. Don't think it is a good idea to buy the first model year. My girlfriend wants my red C5 when I buy the C6. I do not think it fits her finger. .:D :D

Re: the other posts.. I am so suprised with the feedback... I am impressed with all the positive comments about their wives. Would it not make a great show like an Ophra W show to have us on there. Common interest plus everyone loves their wives/girlfriends.

It does make sense to divert the ring $$$ into a house or 401(k) and throttle back on the cost of the ring.

Bumpyride-- I cry out in joy too if my girlfriend took me to the Chevy dealer - her jewelry store equiv. - and let me get fitted for a C6 and bought it for me.

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Originally posted by Enzo

Two words.....Cubic Zirconium!!

Just kidding.

No... you really should buy cubic zirconium :)

The diamond industry is one of those really, really evil, things in this world. Supposedly 15% of the diamonds in the US are blood diamonds or conflict diamonds (diamonds mined and sold to back insurgent/rebel war efforts). In addition, the prices of diamonds are basically being illegally manipulated by the De Beers company, who essentially have a monopoly on the market and keep supplies low to keep the price artificially high.

And before you say that the price is all worth it since the symbol of the diamond is your everlasting love... understand that the idea that diamonds==everlasting, true love was essentially the result of a marketing campaign in the 30s by, you guessed it, De Beers.

Supposedly De Beers no longer sells blood diamonds, so if you buy a diamond here, you are either paying a hugely inflated price to the company that has violated all sorts of antitrust laws to inflate that price, or you may be funding truly cruel wars in Africa.

See: The Straight Dope on diamond prices

and: De Beers entry in wikipedia

and: Blood Diamond entry in wikipedia

and: Revolutionary United Front entry in wikipedia

Heh, I feel a little like Debbie Downer, but really... buy anything but a diamond :) Cubic Zirconium will do, or those artificial diamonds made from real carbon (indistinguishable from real diamonds... except that the artificial ones have fewer imperfections...) :p

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Originally posted by Baka Dasai

I'd go one further and say that a marriage certificate is superficial and doesn't bind the relationship.

You're right, a marriage certificate alone does not, however having your wedding witnessed by the people you love and care about does.

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