Welcome to bomber. This is my 3rd season on plates, but I don't really race. I have heard from many that you can't go wrong with an F2 Speedster. I have both the GS and SL and they truly rip. I was carving up steeper parts of blues using my SL on snow/ice (frozen granular) most people couldn't even turn on, a few weeks ago. That thing just cuts right into the ice and holds. I was lucky enough to get it used for cheap in the classifieds here.
F2 makes great non custom boards that are great right out of the bo
x, but once you get more competitive, go for a metal board from Coiler or Prior.
Size wise, I'm 5'11'' 180 and for SL i have a 162, and a 183 for GS. As tex said, go with burton plates for now. For boots, I use UPZ, and I really like the stiffness of them, and you might too if you're racing. I think its one of the stiffer boots out there.
I've never tried softies, but from what I heard/seen, you might look like you're brand new to snowboarding when you strap on some hardboots. In the transition from soft to hardboot, you loose a great deal of range of motion and the muscles you use to carve are pretty different.